“No evidence of disease” your doctor tells you. You are cancer-free – but your mind doesn’t connect the words.
You have just been through over two years of chemotherapy, radiation, CTScans, Tests, blood drawn enough to fill a gallon container, sleepless nights, exhaustion, hair loss, fatigue, fear and it is all summarized by that one sentence – “No evidence of disease”.
You went through the most exhausting fight of your life and it is important to acknowledge this.
Additionally, it is vital to express your thoughts, concerns, fears, doubts and questions because looking ahead is like a flashlight your hand – you can only see as far as it lights your path.
I am perhaps at a place where some of you might be. NED for 1 year, hair growing back, starting to look human again – but stuck.
Yes, stuck in a holding pattern without a real direction or motivation or even purpose to plan more than for the next day.
Yes, I am thankful I am alive, and not complaining about it.
But living is also being and doing – and I am not.
Have you felt this way?